Monday, February 4, 2013

It's Already 2013? Really?...

Can't believe that we're into the second month of the new year...

Time flies.

Oh Lord.

We're getting older...wrinkler...

Well...this is so belated but Happy 2013, everyone...

Monday, October 22, 2012

Cheat, Liar, Cheat, Liar

(source: Woman's Day)

Can you spot a husband prone to infidelity? If he's unhappy with his wife, he'll cheat, right? Not necessarily. According to a Rutgers University study, 56% of men who have affairs claim to be happy in their marriages. They're largely satisfied with all they have and aren't looking for a way out, yet they still find themselves in bed with other women-and in hot water with their wives. Here, experts explain this phenomenon and dispel other popular cheating myths.

Related: Check out the 11 signs that he might be having an affair.

Fact #1: Most men are still in love with their wives when they cheat.
Men who cheat haven't fallen out of love; they've become unsatisfied with the current state of it. "Cheating usually occurs in the phase of companionate love, when couples begin to settle down, have kids and solidify the life being built together," says clinical psychologist Andra Brosh, PhD. While they're fulfilled in some areas, like being a provider, the romance may be missing. "We more often think of women complaining about a lack of romance, but men feel it, too," says Dr. Brosh. "They frequently suffer in silence, believing they can't get what they want from their spouses." To avoid this in your marriage, plan nights out together, set aside time for sex and discuss hopes and dreams--not just workdays and your son's last soccer game.


Fact #2: Men usually cheat with women they know.

Cheaters don't generally pick up random women in bars. "My first husband cheated on me with a childhood friend," says Diane* from New York City. "His family was close to her family, so they never lost touch." Intimacy expert Mary Jo Rapini explains, "A lot of women think that all cheating women are floozies-not true. The relationships are usually friendships first." In fact, more than 60% of affairs start at work, according to Focus on the Family. A good idea: Make sure your husband feels more connected to you than to his business partner. "Spouses go to work, take care of their kids and do separate things at night. That has to stop," says Rapini. She suggests always going to bed at the same time and cuddling.

Related: Find out the 10 things your husband's friends are hiding from you.
Fact #3: Men cheat to save their marriages.
"Men love their spouses, but they don't know how to fix their relationship problems, so they go outside their marriages to fill any holes," says licensed marriage and family therapist Susan Mandel, PhD. Men want it all and have the skewed notion that another woman will make the longing for something more disappear. Then, they can live happily ever after with their wife--and their mistress--without confronting the real issues.


Fact #4: Men hate themselves after affairs.

You may think of cheaters as men without morals, but while they may like what they did, they tend to despise themselves after their indiscretions. "If he puts his ego to the side, he'll feel like a piece of garbage," says relationship expert Charles J. Orlando, author of The Problem with Women...Is Men. "After all, he's betraying another human being who he claims to care about, so that takes its toll on every part of his psyche." A cheater can feel as though he's failed as a man.


Fact #5: Cheaters often get friskier with their wives when affairs begin.

Just because a husband's touchy-feely doesn't mean his marriage is on firm footing. "When a man starts cheating, he becomes hyperactive sexually," says Rapini, explaining that his sex drive has been awakened, and his wife is still the one with whom he feels most comfortable sexually. If you notice a sudden change in your husband's sex drive, it should raise a red flag. Be on the lookout for the switch to flip off again. "After the affair is solid, he may begin to pull away," says Rapini.

Related: Discover 10 things men wish women knew about sex.


Fact #6: Women cheat just as much as men, and their affairs are more dangerous.

An Indiana University study shows that men and women cheat at the same rate. But "the reasons the sexes cheat are different," says Orlando. He explains women are more likely to cheat for emotional satisfaction. "Online cheating--without any physical contact--is the most damaging type of infidelity," says Orlando. Becoming emotionally invested in another person means you've likely checked out of your marriage. But if it's just sex, it's less about attachment and more about a hurtful mistake.


Fact #7: A wife often knows her husband's cheating.

How could Tiger Woods's ex, Elin Nordegren, and Arnold Schwarzenegger's ex, Maria Shriver, not have known what their high-profile husbands were up to? They probably did, but couldn't bear to acknowledge it. "At one level, I knew, but my denial was so strong," says Lily* from Toronto, Canada. "The pain, had I accepted it at that time, would have been too horrendous, so I had to process it slowly." According to Dr. Brosh, the jilted celebrities were likely doing the same thing: choosing what they could live with for the sake of their kids or to avoid humiliation and the fallout.


Fact #8: A couple will never work it out when the husband is in the midst of an affair.

They could agree to work on things, but it won't matter. If he's still in the throes of a hot, new romance, nothing a woman does will drag him out of it. "He's got such positivity happening, without all the drama that exists in the established relationship," says Orlando. The marriage will likely fail, unless he decides on his own accord that life isn't better with the other woman. So the key is prevention. Continue to be the woman he first fell for throughout your marriage. "Women often turn from a loving girlfriend into a nagging wife. Men aren't attracted to that." Dole out compliments and surprise him with sex--don't just yell at him about that towel on the bathroom floor, suggests Dr. Mandel.


Fact #9: Affairs can often fix a marriage.

Is infidelity the kiss of death for a couple? Not always. Although a new relationship is exciting, "an affair can rekindle the marriage," says Orlando. "Men realize who they want for the rest of their lives and that the new relationship isn't as perfect as they thought." But think hard before returning to a cheater. "Flings can highlight how little self-control someone has," explains Orlando. Still, if it was truly a one-time slip, it's possible to get back on track.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Five Year-old Dies In Car....

This such a tragedy.
This happened on Tuesday in Johor Baru.
A woman left her five-year-old son in the back seat of her car for several hours -- another report said 6 hours.
The little boy died....

News reports said the woman "accidentally left him" in car.
The woman is a teacher in her 40s.
 It's not that she went shopping or playing one-armed bandits or some gambling thing.

She was at her school.

She did not accidentally leave her son. She knew what she was doing but she did not think the boy would die.
 According to news reports, she left her house at around 7am to send her son to the kindergarten near their house in Taman Perling in JB on Tuesday before heading to school.
But she decided to rush to school first to settle some work-related matters.
She is said to have lost track of time and only remembered more than five hours later that she had left her sleeping son in the car.
When she rushed to her car at around 1.30pm, she found him lying unconscious.
The teacher rushed the boy to the Sultanah Aminah Hospital, where doctors pronounced him dead.
Small groups of friends and relatives, as well as the teacher's colleagues, were seen visiting the family at their house from 1pm.
By 3pm, the whole road leading to their house was lined with cars and the crowd had swelled, with many forced to stand outside the gate.
The little was scheduled to  be cremated at the Kebun Teh Hindu crematorium today.
A police source said the case had been classified as sudden death.

But latest -- the police investigating the woman for negligence.

I don't know...I'm sure she didn't mean for her son to die....but....

Friday, April 27, 2012

Dataran Merdeka -- Closed For the Day..

I am a little pissed because I have four friends from Ireland on a two-week long visit to this country who now cannot go to Dataran Merdeka and the city because the square has been barricaded and several parts of the city are closed.

In fact before they came, they were worried that KL will be rioted like London last year and KL will burn to the ground....

What rubbish, I said. No no no....there's no "spring" whatever here. No riots, no burning.

Sure, some people, maybe hundreds, thousands are planning to occupy Dataran Merdeka, but we have a good police force that will make sure there'd be no riot.

But, damn...they're not taking any chances and closed the square.

Anyway, my Irish friends think that Malaysia is in deep shit.

Hell NO!

Come on over, I tell them. Don't believe those whackos in Malaysiakini and all those people who are damning the country because they want to topple the government and take over this damned corrupt country.

I've long been convinced that these politicians are bloody f-ucking liars and their hardcore supporters equally bad.

Watched the footages on Dataran Merdeka. And you want me to trust you????..

 


Sunday, February 12, 2012

Dearest Whitney...


I am so sad. the news of your sudden death came as a shock. I thought Antonio was bluffing me when he burst into our room to tell me that "Whitney has died".

"Whitney who? Houston? No way..."

But then. I remember that you had been struggling with your health......

I feel I have known you throughout my adult life. Your songs have pulled through those emotional times --- then and now.

You are gone too soon. I know you were going through so much yourself. God knows the pain you must have suffered.

You were so beautiful. I just want to remember you that way.

Farewell, Whitney. There will never be another.

You're in a better better place. Rest in peace now.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Breaking Up With Dignity

(By Christian Adi, The Jakarta Globe)

In a relationship, when a women loses attraction to her committed partner and is attracted to someone else, while comparing you with the other guy on how good he is in every way you’re not, then it’s time for you to leave her better than you found her.

These are the top three reasons why you should leave her better than you found her:

1. You’ll come off trying too hard.

If you try to be the person that she wanted, it won’t work because she already knows you and isn’t attracted to you anymore, so if you suddenly change she might laugh at you because it may be unnatural for her. Therefore, she will less likely appreciate you. Let’s face the fact that perhaps the guy that she likes right now can fill the unsatisfied part in your relationship. Plus, the next candidate might have more experience and potential than you in her eyes.

2. It’s damaging for your character.

First, you don’t want someone to compare you every time or even sometimes, especially to another guy who is better in her eyes. In fact, the stupidest thing that you can do is to try catch up with this guy’s experience whilst your core competencies may not be at his level (business experience, local knowledge, and how to treat women).

3. You will have no value in her eyes and may come off as a needy loser with mental problems if you’re still yearning for her after the break up phase.

Even though we have already fallen for her, clearly knowing that she drives us crazy, we still try everything we can to reconnect. Sadly, sometimes the way she acts and talks to you may be asking for a bitch slap because one of us needs to learn to shut up. But nonetheless, at this point you know that she will never feel wrong, and if she feels guilty about herself, then she’ll run away or feel shame because the faith has been broken. There won’t be any mutual trust anymore, and the next great line you will hear from her may well be “If you love someone, you gotta let go.”

Monday, January 9, 2012

It's Over..


...when it's over and until the fat lady sings?

I'm no commentator of anything -- social or political issues. But, the Sodomy 11 trial of Dato Seri Anwar Ibrahim was beginning to wear me real thin.

Don't ask me what I think -- whether HE really did it. I wouldn't know, and neither would you.

But, if I were to be presiding over the case and forced to make a conclusion, I'd have to say that there was sex. I mean...you know. Can anyone really make up that kind of story?

But well, I'm no judge. I'm not Justice Mohamad Zabidin Mohd Diah.

I suppose you must convince the court and prove "beyond reasonable doubt" or something...
And because you can't take Saiful's word for it -- heck, there's no case.

And then you have Anwar's supporters saying that the case shouldn't have gone to court in the first plac. What? Why not?

Blah blah blah...

They all say the Prime Minister is the one controlling the court.
What?
Oour Malaysian courts are kangaroo courts, or didn't you know that?
What?
I really hate it when these people label our courts as kangaroo courts.

If I were a judge, I'd sue them all.

Just because "orang tersayang kamu" was on trial, doesn't mean that the courts are unfair.

How dare you!?